"It is He who reveals the profound and hidden things; He knows what is in the darkness, and the light dwells with Him." -Daniel 2:22
"Do not fear, for I am with you..." -Isaiah 43:5
"...we are not presenting our supplications before You on account of any merits of our own, but on account of Your great compassion." -Daniel 9:18

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Hanging on the Promises

I am the same kind of nurse that I was a mother - somewhat neglectful and scatter-brained, at times. Good thing God is the one in charge around here. He didn't do too badly with Justin, so I guess He will take care of Al with or without me. His work is not finished with Justin. It is a promise. It's what I hang my hat on as a mother of a 21 year old.
With Al...there again, hanging on His promises.
We are approaching the 2 year mark of Al's diagnosis. I would have thought we would be at a different place. Someplace more definitive. It just continues to be a daily struggle for him to feel good at all. We are thankful for those moments and know that it could all be much worse.
After a mix up with his pain Rx (he got more hydrocodone instead of oxycodone) and taking days to get it straight, we thought he would be back to a good place. But, alas, not so. (How's that for drama!) He is still experiencing a lot of pain in his legs and feet. He still has the sniffles and just has no energy.
He got that shot of neupogen at our last visit with the doc, but that kept him awake for 3 days straight. It didn't give him energy, it just wired him. Made things worse.
It is a constant battle to get all the stars (energy, no pain, no ailments) to align themselves for him to have a whole day of feeling good. It is amazing to me that he still gets up and goes to work every day. I don't know what will happen when he is no longer able to do that.
I am so very grateful to our Lord that I have been able to be at home for Al these past 2 years. I don't know what the future looks like, but I know that God has got it all figured out. We just take each day as it comes. Deal with whatever has to be dealt with and let Him take care of future plans and needs. It is a difficult and easy place to be. Difficult if you have trouble letting go and easy if you do.

1 comment:

Perspective is Everything said...

Know what you are sayin'! Ugh.. wish I didn't but I do.. Ignorance is bliss.. lol